What this test looks at
Many people notice they keep falling for someone who is warm, then distant, then warm again. The spark is real. It may also be recognition of something familiar.
This test looks at what draws you in and what makes you lose interest — not to judge your taste, but to show which pattern is doing the choosing.
- Attraction to distanceInterest rising when someone is hard to reach.
- Discomfort with consistencyLosing interest when someone is reliably available.
- Over-investmentGiving more to earn closeness.
- RescuingBeing drawn to people you might fix or unlock.
How to answer
Answer for the last few months rather than one bad day. If a question doesn’t quite fit, pick the answer closest to what usually happens. There are no trick questions and nothing is saved on a server.
What your result can — and can’t — tell you
You’ll see an overall pattern level, a breakdown by dimension, and the specific behaviors that stood out in your answers. It reflects how you see your own behavior, which is useful but never the whole picture.
This is a structured reflective assessment, informed by relationship research but not a validated clinical instrument. How we build our tests
Questions people ask
- Why am I attracted to emotionally unavailable people?
- Common explanations include anxious attachment, familiarity with inconsistent affection from earlier relationships, and the way uncertainty heightens attention and arousal — which can feel like chemistry.
- How do I stop chasing unavailable people?
- Start by noticing when interest spikes and whether uncertainty is present. Giving consistent people more time before deciding there’s no spark is often a useful experiment.
Why do I chase people who pull away?
Start the test